Where does the good go?
by wannabe-writer369
Summary: Quinntana fanfic. Quinn's POV. Santana and Quinn have always been best friends, but will they always stay just that?
1. I've got you & you've got me

Santana and I have always been best friends. Literally always. We've always lived in the same neighbourhood, we went to kidergarten together, we went to primary school together, and here we are; high school. Toghether, again.

It feels like only yesterday we were 4 years old we played in the park, as our moms sat on the bench chatting. We never even fough over the toys, like kids always to. It was okay for us to take each other's toys, because even then we trusted each other and I guess we kind of knew that the other one will eventually give the toy back. But if somebody else took one of my toys, Santana would yell at them and often even make them eat sand or dirt or whatever was the closest to grab. I would make the same thing. Well, without that sand and dirt thing. I would nicely tell them that if they don't give Santana her toy back, I'd call my dad, and my dad was a police man, which scared the shit out of the other kids.

Or that time when we were in kindergarten and everybody laughed at me because I peed my pants, Santana was the one who told them to stop laughing or, let me qoute her, she'd pull all of their hair out so they'd be even uglier than they already are. Then she took my hand and helped me get changed. I remembered I cried in the bathroom, and she hugged me and told me that everything's going to be alright and that they won't make fun of me anymore. I trusted her so I believed what she said. And it was true, they never made fun of me again.

Another memory that I can't erase is the first day of school. We entered the building holding hands, because I was scared that I'd get lost among the other kids. I don't know if she held my hand just to make me feel safer, or to make _herself_ feel safer. She always told me that everything's better when I'm around.

We were literally inseperable through primary school.

Once, I was sick, so I didn't go to school, and Santana came over in the afternoon crying and yelling at me because she didn't have anybody else to hang out with. I calmed her down and we watched cartoons until her mom picked her up in the evening. I remember she fell asleep in my arms and I told her mom to be careful not to wake her up.  
What Santana didn't tell me is that kids from school made fun of her for being alone all the time that day. I guess she was too proud to tell me.

There are a lot more memories; hanging out in the park, sleepovers, picnics in her treehouse, trying on nail polishes and make up when we were around 13, dressing up just for fun, helping each other with homework, dancing, laughing, screaming… I loved every minute we spent together.

And here we are. High school.


	2. Baby, this is the last honest look

So, high school.

We continued out tradition. Always together.

One night, during the first few weeks of school, we had a sleepover at my house. Those cartoons we used to watch were now replaced with romantic dramas and comedies, well, mostly dramas because we both kind of liked them more.  
So, there we were, lying on my bed, watching movies on TV. I don't remember what the movie was called, but it was about a girl whose heart was broken by some boy. Typical, I know. We can't help ourselves, we just love romantic stuff. There was a scene with the girl crying, and Santana put her arm around me and said:

''I'm going to kill anyone who breaks your heart.'' and she looked me deeply in the eyes.

I looked deeply into hers too.

''Thanks. I will kill anyone who even tries to hurt you in any way.'' I replied.

She just smiled. We were still looking at each other, when all of a sudden she kissed me. I have no idea where it came from because we've never kissed before. I considered her my best friend, and that's what she was.

I didn't resist the kiss though. I actually really liked it. It felt special, real. She kissed me in the way that none of the boys have kissed me before. Boys always use too much tongue and they're trying everything just to touch my boobs or my ass. When Santana kissed me, it was gentle, and I knew it wasn't just to get in my pants.

But still. Am I gay now? I can't be. My parents would kill me. No, I'm not gay. This was just a stupid kiss.

We didn't talk about the kiss that evening at all, we both kind of tried to ignore it, so we just kept having random conversations.

''I have a date tomorrow.'' Were the first words that slipped out of my mouth.

Not the best thing to hear from someone after you kiss them, huh?

''Oh, really?'' she asked. ''With who?''

''This guy Finn. He's on the football team.''

''Is he hot?''

''He's okay.''

''I'll have to check him out, see if he's good enough for you.''

''You can't control who I date, you know?''

''I know. But I don't want to see you crying like the girl in the movie is crying. Believe it or not, I care about you.''

This was the first time I heard her say that. Sure, she always did the things from which was obvious that she cared, and that she loved me, but hearing her say that was different, it was new.

''I know you do. I care about you too, but you can't protect me forever. I have to get hurt sometimes, to realize some things by myself. I appreciate everything you've ever done to me, but the world is cruel and you won't be able to protect me from everything that'll happen to me.''

''I could be…'' she said quietly, looking a little hurt.

I gave her the look that meant ''I don't want to fight with you'', kissed her forehead and pulled her head on my chest. She just left it resting there.  
Lying with her like that felt pretty good, I have to admit.  
We fell asleep in each other's arms.


	3. It's just this day

Months went by, and nothing actually changed between me and Santana. We hung out every day, we walked to school together, we went home together, we had sleepovers We didn't kiss again though. I was dating Finn and she started being a little weird. Quieter, distant, confused. I don't know. I was confused too, but I didn't ask her what's wrong. I figured she'd tell me if it was important, like she always did.

Finn actually wasn't that great, but he kept my mind off Santana, and off that thought I had a few months ago. Being gay. I just can't be gay. My parents are religious. I'm religious too. I don't even want to think about what they'd do to me if I was gay.

So, Finn and I were actually dating. I didn't love him or anything, I just had the need to be popular, and all the popular girls have boyfriends, right?  
And he was mine, fucking mine, and I was really pissed when he joined the stupid Glee Club, because that bitch Rachel Berry is looking at him like he's a piece of meat and she's a fucking wolf. He's on the football team, and considering I'm a cheerleader, we are perfect for each other.

Honestly, I don't even know when I've become this person. These things, like reputation, are not supposed to matter this much. I don't know what's happening. Is high school changing me?

Speaking of Cheerios, I wouldn't even sing up if Santana didn't make me.

''You're awesome at dancing, you should totally try it. I'll go with you.'' She said.

We both got in. We're pretty good, actually. And it's just another way of spending time together. I kind of feel sorry for her because I started cancelling movie night with her just to have making out sessions with Finn. I don't even enjoy them, and I get scared and uncomfortable every time he touches me.

Today I saw Finn performing some song with Rachel at Glee Club. They totally looked like a couple. I'm not gonna let that bitch take him away from me.

I tried to make a compromise with him; if he quit the Glee Club, I'm letting him touch my boobs. I wouldn't like it at all though, I feel disgused even thinking about it, but I gotta do what I gotta do. He said no. Stupid Rachel even joined my Celibacy Club. Ugh. Everything just to be closer to Finn.  
Only one thing left to do: join the stupid Glee Club.

I went on an audition today. Santana and our new friend, Brittany, went with me. Brittany is also a cheerleader. I think Santana and her are getting a little close, I just hope that she won't try to take Santana away from me, like Rachel is trying to take Finn.

I think our coach Sue got a little angry with us for auditioning for Glee, but we straigthened everything up with her. She's okay with us being in Glee, as long as we inform her about everything they're doing. I'm okay with that. I talked to Santana after we left Sue's office.

''Hey, can I talk to you?'' I asked her. ''Alone?'' I said and moved my sight towards Brittany.

''That means she wants you to go away.'' Santana whispered to Brittany.

''Oh. See you later then, I guess.'' Brittany said, looking a little hurt, though and left.

''What, is she too stupid to figure some things out by herself?'' I asked angrily.

''Actually no, she's not that bright and I think you just hurt her.''

''Since when do you care about her that much?''

''She's my friend.''

''I'm your best friend.''

''I'm allowed to have other friends.'' She said raising her voice.

''But it's always been just you and me. I miss you.''

''It's not exactly my fault that you're spending all of your free time with Finn.''

''What? Are you jealous? You'd like it if I spent time making out with you, not him, wouldn't you?''

It just slipped out of my mouth. I don't know what I was thinking. Well, I wasn't thinking Santana just looked at me and I could see the disappointment, anger and hurt in her eyes.  
This was our first fight and I cried for hours when I got home, until I got a phone call from Puck.

''Hey Quinn, what are you doing tonight?''

''Hey. Umm, I was supposed to hang out with Finn but he cancelled. Said something came up and he had to stay home.''

''Yeah, I just talked to him and he's at Rachel's house. Practising something for Glee or whatever. You sure your boyfriend's straight?''

Rachel. Her again. When I heard that Finn's with her when he's supposed to be with me, I felt completely dumb. First I disappointed Santana and now this.

''Hey, are you there? I'm sorry, I'm sure he's still straight when he's dating you.''

''Yeaah, he was straight last time I checked. Hey, wanna come over? The whole house is empty and I've got nothing to do.''

Oh God, what am I doing?

''Sure, I'll be there in 10 minutes.''

''So, what are we going to do?'' he asked as we came into my room.

We both sat on my bed, and I didn't know what to say. I was still confused about everything.

I kissed him, and of course, he didn't complain about it. In a minute I found myself lying on my bed, with Puck on top of me, kissing me, touching me

Half an hour later I found myself naked, with him lying next to me, saying that I was good but he has to leave or something. I don't know. I was even more confused now. I still couldn't believe what had just happened.

He left and I cried myself to sleep. 


	4. I can't take it

**Sorry it took me a little longer than usual to update, I started writing a Heya one-shot and I'm trying to update my Brittana fic, and I also have an idea for a couple of more things, but I don't want to start anything else until I finish these 3, so..**  
**And I realized I made a couple of mistakes in the last chapter (probably in others too, English's not my first language and I usually write right before I go to bed so I'm too exhausted to check my grammar).**

**And I'd just like to add that I appreciate all of your comments and thoughts on this, but I write for _myself_, and I don't plan on changing that because writing is a way of expressing myself, not pleasing other people. If there are people who actually like it, great, if not, don't read it. Sorry if I sound mean but I just thought I'd make this clear.**

**And thank you all for reviews, favorites and alerts. It means a lot. You're all awesome! :)**

* * *

I woke up with an awful headache the next morning. I felt so sick that I didn't even plan on going to school. I was just about to go back to sleep when I heard my phone buzzing on my bedside table. I let out a strange moan which was probably my body saying that I was too tired to move, but I somehow managed to stretch my arm and grab the phone.

_Hey… Look, I'm sorry for yesterday, you know I didn't mean what I said. Wanna walk to school with me? Maybe we can talk?_

It was a text from Santana.  
I immediately felt less tired.

I threw my phone somewhere next to my feet on my bed, remembering everything I said to her yesterday and being really mad at myself. Also, I wanted to make sure I'd actually get up and text her back.

I rubbed my eyes and blinked fast a few times to get them used to the sunlight in my room. I stretched my arms as far as I could in the air, yawned and sat up on the bed.

I grabbed the phone with my right hand, and fixed my hair with my left one as I texted her back.

_I'm the one who's sorry. It's not your fault. I just snapped at you without a reason. Yeah, sure, meet me in half an hour in front of my house._

* * *

I saw Santana standing in front of my house and I ran out and hugged her.

''I am so sorry for everything. I won't let anything like that happen again.'' This time I was actually thinking about what I way saying.

''Oh I'm sorry too.'' She said as she hugged me tighter. ''Let's just forget about it, okay?'' she pulled away and looked me in the eyes, just like she did that night… when we kissed.

''Sure.'' I said and smiled.

''So, what did you do yesterday, except you know, being a bitch to me?'' she asked, and I could tell that she was a little hurt, but the way she joked about it made it better. If she can joke about it, it means she didn't take it too seriously, and she knew I wouldn't get mad for the expression she had just used to describe my behaviour. I admit it; I was acting a little bitchy.

I remembered Puck… I remembered his naked body on mine. I remembered everything. I remembered his sloppy kisses, his sweaty body, his moans… And I remembered me just lying there, feeling numb.

''Nothing much, watched TV and fell asleep. You?''

I wasn't ready to talk about what happened between me and Puck. I knew I'd eventually tell her, but not yet. I still wasn't completely aware that it actually happened…

''Puck came over, said he was in the neighbourhood so he thought he'd stop by. He seems sweet, right? And he's definitely hot!''

What? Is that where Puck had to go? Ugh, guys, never satisfied with only one girl. I didn't know how I was supposed to feel. I knew that having sex with Puck didn't mean dating him, but still, how could he do that?

''Oh. What did you do?'' my voice because quieter, and my eyes were wide open.

''Nothing much, made out a little. He tried to do more but I didn't let him.''

''Sounds fun.'' I said, not sounding really convincing. I almost broke down and cried, but I was stronger than that. Okay, I probably wasn't but at that moment I was still too numb, tired and confused to actually feel anything else.

* * *

''Hey hotties.'' Puck said and winked at both of us as we entered the school.

Santana smiled at him seductively, and I just felt sick in my stomach.

''Hey, where are you going? The class is not in that direction, you know?'' Santana asked as I started walking to the bathroom.

''Oh, I know, I have to use the bathroom. Just go on, don't be late because of me, I'll be there in a minute.'' I said, turned around and continued walking.

* * *

I was sitting on the floor, with my knees pulled up to my chest and my arms holding my legs. My head was leaned on my knees but I looked up as soon as I heard someone opening the door.

''Quinn, what the fuck? Do you have any idea how scared I was? Where were you? I sent you like 15 texts.'' she yelled at me.

''Here.'' I said, still crying.

''Oh my God, why are you crying?'' she said, feeling a little sorry for not noticing it as soon as she saw me.

She sat next to me, with her upper body facing me. She put her left hand on my knee.

''What happened?'' she asked, sounding really concerned.

''I slept with Puck.'' I said and started crying ever harder. I broke down even more and fell into her arms. She pulled me closer and just held me, not saying anything. Her right hand gently stroked my back, while her left one rested on my right hip, holding me.

We sat like this for a couple of minutes, until she broke the silence.

''Did you'' she started, still thinking what would be the appropriate thing to ask, and whether to continue or just hold me a little longer. Well, she continued. ''… use protection?''

''No.'' the words barely came out of my mouth; I was unable to make proper sentences. I started crying even more.

She held me tighter as I continued sobbing and crying all over her shirt. I couldn't even breathe properly.

''Shhh, everything'll be okay.'' She said, trying to calm me down. Her voice was really quiet. She moved her right hand up and gently stroked my hair.


	5. Had a bad day, as bad as they come

**I wanted this chapter to be better and longer, but I also wanted to update before I left on a vacation, and I'm leaving in a couple of hours, so here it is. Sorry!**

* * *

''Where are your keys?'' Santana asked as she cupped my cheek, trying to turn my face towards her.

We were standing in front of my front door. She walked me home, with her arm around my waist the whole time.  
I've stopped crying and I focused on following her steps, my arms crossed on my chest, my head facing the ground. I'd let out a quiet sob every few minutes, trying my best not to cry. She pulled me closer and her arm tightened around my waist every time I did. I had a feeling that she was trying to tell me to try and remain calm, that soon we'd be home so I can fall apart and fall into her arms again.

''Somewhere in my bag.'' I replied quietly, still looking down at the ground.

Knowing that I'm home, tears came streaming down my face. I pulled my arms from my chest and put my hands over my face. Santana was looking for my keys, so she had to remove her arm from my waist.

''…where the fuck are they…''

My body was shaking and I started sobbing heavily.

''…hold on Q, I can't find the keys''

I lost that little sense of gravity I've had left and tried to lean on the door, but I was too weak to stay on my feet. I sat down, in exactly the same position Santana has found me in earlier in the bathroom and the only thing I could feel was the warmness of the tears streaming down my face.

''…found them!'' she said excitingly. ''Oh fuck! Quinn, are you okay?''

She kneeled down next to me and pulled me up.

''Come on, let's go inside,'' she said as she opened the door.

She closed the door behind us and pulled me by the waist, again. She led us upstairs to my room. As soon as she placed me on the bed, she closed the door and found my pyjamas. She found the ones she was always wearing when she was here, too.

''I'm gonna go change in the bathroom, you change here and then we can talk if you want to, or watch movies or something. Okay?'' she said in the softest voice I've ever heard her talk in.

I nodded. I was still in shock from everything. My whole life was ruined and I was supposed to just put my pyjamas on and go on with it? I figured I'd just sit a few more seconds and then change, but obviously a lot more time has passed because Santana was back in my room.

''Need help with changing?'' she offered as she put her clothes on one of my nightstands.

I nodded again.

She took my shirt off and carefully put it on my other nightstand. She took my skirt off too.  
Then I just fell apart again. I couldn't sit anymore, I had to lie down. I out my head on her thigh, and pulled my knees to my chest.

''Q, I haven't put your pyjamas on.'' She was still speaking in that soft voice.

I started crying again, because I was unable to talk to her. I wasn't able to do anything, actually. I wanted to say something, at least thank her for taking care of me, for being there when I needed her the most. She was always there, but I don't think I could get through today if I didn't have her next to me the whole time.

''I'll just cover you with a blanket if that's okay.''

I nodded.

She pulled the blanket on top of me, and she lied down too. My head rested on her chest and I managed to put my arm on her stomach. Her arms were pulled tightly around me and she kissed my forehead every few minutes just to let me know that she's there.

I was tired and as I tried to fall asleep I heard her saying things like ''Everything will be fine'' and ''I'm here for you''.

* * *

I woke up snuggled up into Santana and last day seemed blurry. Like I was drunk and now I have the worst hangover ever. I didn't feel any better but I wasn't in that weird shock anymore. Well, okay, maybe I did feel better, but that's only because I knew I wasn't alone.

My head was still resting on her chest, and her breathing calmed me down a little.

''Good morning.'' Santana said in the same soft voice she spoke in yesterday. How ever blurry yesterday was, I remember her soft voice. It's probably the nicest thing I've ever heard. It was so cute, but it sounded so concerned at the same time.

''Hey.'' I replied and we both stayed quiet for a couple of moments. ''How'd you know I was awake?''

''I just did. Best friends know stuff like that. I also know you're feeling better.''

''How would you know that?''

''You're speaking.'' When she realised I'm not going to say anything back, she continued talking. ''Do you want me to stay here today, too? We don't have to go to school if you don't want to.''

''You have to go to school.''

''Well, you have to go too.'

''I don't want to. I can't. I don't have the strength to get up from bed.''

''Wow, three sentences. That's a success.'' She chuckled.

We were still in the same position we woke up in. Her breathing still amazed me. It was so light, and her heartbeat coincided with mine.

''Your parents left for work about an hour ago,'' she continued speaking.

I didn't want to talk. I wanted to just lie on top of her and listen to her heartbeat.

''Are you hungry? I could make us some breakfast.''

''Don't go,'' I said as quickly I could and I hugged her tighter before she could even think about getting out of the bed. I didn't want her to leave. I was afraid I'd start panicking again if she left, if I couldn't hear her heartbeat and her breaths anymore.

''Okay, I can stay,'' she said as she kissed my forehead. I remember her kissing my forehead last night. Or was it afternoon? I wasn't sure. It didn't matter, either. She mattered. I could stay with her like this forever. It would make everything alright.

''Let's just stay here today. Fuck school. I just want you,'' I said and she pulled me tighter and placed another kiss on my forehead.

As long as I'm here with here, nothing can hurt me. Nothing.


	6. I deserve this anguish on my house

Santana has been spending nights at my house for the last couple of days. It's just easier to fall asleep in her arms. Also, I've been avoiding Finn as much as I can. We're sort of dating, but I obviously fucked things up, big time. I just don't want to deal with him right now. I can't.

Holy shit. Why do I feel so sick all of a sudden? I just woke up, I haven't even had breakfast yet.

''Holy fuck,'' I say with a frown on my face as I get up from the bed, not even bothering whether I'll wake Santana or not, and run to the bathroom.

I stop in front of the toilet and get down on my knees. And it just goes out. Sticky, smelly vomit.

''Quinn, come back to beeeed, it's so cold here,'' I hear Santana calling me from my bedroom.

I get up, flush the toilet and walk towards the sink. I turn the water on and just let it run. I want to wash my face and as I reach for the water with my hands, I realize they're shaking. I look up and meet my reflection in the mirror. My cheeks are red, my lips are shaking, and my eyes are wet. I'm crying.

I splash the water on my face a couple of times, trying to calm myself down.

I turn the water off and reach for the towel hanging next to the sink. I wipe the water away from my face and put the towel down.

I feel calmer. I still don't know why I puked though.

''Quinn, pleeease come back,'' I hear Santana calling me desperately, again.

As I slowly get out of the bedroom and walk towards my bedroom, I realize my hands are still shaking. I put my arms on my chest to try and hide it. I look down and see that my whole body is shaking. I try to walk slower, so I'll be completely calm when I reach the bedroom.

I reached the bedroom and I'm standing in the doorway.

''Where'd you go?'' Santana asks, but I'm afraid to talk. My voice is probably weak and shaky. Maybe if I just get back to bed and turn away from Santana, she wouldn't notice. She'd turn around to face me and she'd wrap her arm around me and get back to sleep. And I'd calm down and maybe get back to sleep too.

I make a step towards the bed and Santana turns around. My jaw drops a little.

She stretches her arms in the air and yawns and I start shaking even more.

She opens her eyes and as soon as she looked at me, she gets up from bed, walking really fast towards me.

''What happened?''

She put her left hand on my right forearm and used her right hand to wipe my tears away. I didn't even realize I was crying again.

''I puked,'' I whisper and start sobbing. More tears came streaming down my face and Santana pulled my head to rest on her shoulder.

''Do you still feel sick?'' It came out as a whisper though it sounded like she wanted to say it normally.

''No.''

''Good,'' she says and her voice is normal now. Her fingers are stroking through my hair and she's holding me tightly, while my arms are still on my chest.

''Everything's gonna be alright,'' she whispers, not intentionally.

''Thanks,'' I whisper back and wrap my arms around her.

It's nothing new, actually, because I've been _really_ emotional about everything lately, and Santana was always there to help me calm down. Last week I cried because I couldn't get my water temperature the way I wanted it before showering. Santana just came and made it right, like she knew the exact temperature I wanted. Yesterday I cried because I couldn't write my essay properly. It had to be between 450 and 500 words. First it was 442, then it was 539, and then it was 508. I gave up and threw the paper in the trash. Santana took it out and wrote it for me. She's been hanging here for over a week now. Some days she went home after taking me home, but she'd be back in an hour. She even went home for dinner once. But mostly, she's been here. My parents didn't notice because they're both working a lot, and her parents don't actually care where she is.

Usually I'd puke after drinking too much, or eating spoiled food, and that kind of stuff. Never like this, without a reason. It was all so confusing, but her words, _everything's gonna be alright_, calmed me down. I stopped crying and pulled away from her.

''Why don't you take a shower and I'll make us breakfast?'' she said, still whispering. It calmed me down when she whispered like that. I nodded and she kissed my forehead and went downstairs.

* * *

''Why are we stopping at the pharmacy store?''

''I have to buy something. Wait for me in the car?''

I nodded and Santana got out of the car. Few minutes after, she returned with a small plastic bag in her hand.

''What is it?'' I asked.

She looked me in the eyes, and after a few moments of staring at me she sighed and started to talk.

''It's for you,'' she said.

''Well, that doesn't answer my question.''

''It's a pregnancy test.''

My eyes widened at her answer.

''I'm sorry but I think you should take it, just to be sure. I didn't mean to upset you.''

Her words were really fast and it seemed like she wasn't sure how I'm going to react.

''Oh,'' I said.

I never thought I could be pregnant. I mean, I know Puck and I didn't use protection, but what are the chances of me actually getting pregnant? No, I'm not. I'm not pregnant. God, that world makes me sick. My life would be over if I was pregnant. Pregnant, pregnant, pregnant. I feel like puking again.

''Quinn!'' I heard Santana yelling at me and she woke me from my thoughts.

''What?'' I asked, turning towards her.

''You completely turned yourself off this world for a minute there, huh?''

''Yeah, sorry,'' I said with a smile on my face.

''Look, you don't have to take the test. I'm throwing it away right now.''

Santana opened her car window and took the test from the bag and almost threw it out, but I stopped her by putting my hand on hers.

''You can't just throw it here! You know what, just it to me, I'll take it first thing I get in school and show you I'm fine, I'm not pregnant.''

''Okay, whatever you want.''

As she gave it to me, her fingers gently stroked my hand and my whole body shivered at her touch. My jaw dropped a little and my eyes widened. I turned my face to the left, searching for hers, only to find her already looking at me.

''T-thanks,'' I mumbled as I broke the touch and put the test in my bag.

* * *

''Do you want me to go with you?''

''No, I can do it by myself. Thanks though.''

''You sure?''

''Yeah. I'll text you.''

''Okay.'' Santana smiled, kissed me on the cheek and left to her class. I, on the other hand, went to the bathroom.

I sat on the toilet and took the pregnancy test out of my bag.

''This is it,'' I whispered.

* * *

''Quinn!'' I heard someone calling me across the hall. I took a deep breath and started walking in the other direction.

''Quinn! Hey, what's with the silent treatment?''

I stopped and leaned against the wall.

''Whatever I did I'm sorry,'' Finn said when he approached me.

''I'm pregnant.''

* * *

**Sorry it took me longer than usual to update. It is the longest chapter so far. I suck, I know. My writing sucks too. Sorry about that.**

**Also, spoiler: I'm breaking Fuinn (is that even their ship name? not sure.) in the next chapter. It's aaaaaall Quinntana from now on. Well, most of it.**


	7. Thank God for you

**Again, I'm sorry it took me long to update. Honestly I'm not satisfied with this story, I thought it'd be better, but then again, it can't be perfect because I can't relate to it at all (like I can with my other ones), but I had an idea for this (and I still do, I know exactly what I want to do but I'm never satisfied with how I write it so I get kinda depressed that I suck so much and just stop writing lol). But yeah, I'm sorry. Also, I know this chapter's short but I'm already writing the next one.**

* * *

''Quinn!'' I hear someone calling me across the hall. I take a deep breath and start walking in the other direction.

''Quinn! Hey, what's with the silent treatment?''

I stop and lean against the wall.

''Whatever I did I'm sorry,'' Finn said when he approached me.

''I'm pregnant.''

''M-mine?'' He asks.

''No,'' I respond.

His jaw drops and I start crying.

''I don't think I can be with you anymore,'' I continue.

''No, I don't think I can be with _you_, you're the one who cheated,'' he says angrily.

''Fine, then we're not together anymore. This relationship sucked anyway,'' I say and walk away.

I couldn't deal with him right now. I never actually felt anything for him, and that's kind of important in a relationship, I guess. But I couldn't deal with relationships right now, I had a baby to think about. What the hell am I supposed to do? My parents will kill me if they find out. Well, there's only one thing to do; abortion.

I open the girl restroom's door and I see a few girls fixing their make up in front of the mirrors, so I shut the door and walk out of the school. I couldn't deal with classes now either. I couldn't deal with Santana because I can't lie to her, and she'd be worried and I'd start crying. So I take a long walk to my house, where I lock myself in my bedroom and cry. Nobody's home so there's actually no need to lock the doors but I did it anyway.  
I can't even think. I need rest. I need sleep. The one you never wake up from.  
I cry myself to sleep, but eventually I wake up. My phone's buzzing in the pocket of my jeans. I shift positions, from lying on my stomach to lying on my back and I take the phone out of my pocket. Santana. Santana's calling me. I don't answer. Few moments later I receive a text message. _Q, answer the phone. I'm worried! _That girl just can't leave me alone. Not that I want her to, I just need some time for myself, some time to think. She calls me a few more times but I don't answer. _I swear I'm coming over if you don't pick up your phone._ Another text. A few seconds later, another call. I answer it this time.

''Finally! Do you have any idea how worried I was?''

''Hello to you, too, Santana.''

''Don't you 'hello' me, I've been calling you all day, what the hell were you doing?''

''Santana, I really don't need another mom in my life.''

''I'm sorry, Quinn. But believe it or not, I care about you just as much as your mom does.''

''Probably even more.''

''So are you gonna tell me what's going on?''

I choke. I can't tell her. I just can't. Especially not over the phone.

''..Quinn? Are you okay?''

''No,'' I say and tears come streaming down my face.

''What's wrong, honey?''

I start sobbing. I can't talk about what's wrong over the phone.

''Are you crying? That's it, I'm coming over!''

Less than 5 minutes passed, and Santana was here. I unlocked the bedroom door the moment after I hung up the phone, so she could just walk in. If I didn't, she'd start screaming and she'd probably think I'm committing suicide or something. That's just what she does; overreact.

''Hey,'' she whispers as she lay in bed behind me. I don't want to turn around, I don't want her to see my cry. ''Is everything alright?'' she asks.

''No,'' I whisper softly, ''I'm pregnant.'' And just like that, I fall apart again. I never let myself fall apart in front of other people, but this is Santana, she knows me better than anybody else and accepts me and her love for me is unconditional.

''It's gonna be alright,'' she whispers as she wraps her arms around me. And instantly I think of the same thing I think of every time she's holding me; _nothing can hurt me as long as he's here._


End file.
